Who said Venting out is good? It’s like smoking
Many friends will advise you to vent it out, don’t keep it inside take it out, take out your anger, your negative thoughts so that you can feel good. But that’s the worst advice anybody can give you, literally worst. I don’t know who advised this in the first place about this method of self-care.
Venting out is like smoking, it helps you to relieve you from temporary stress, but its toxic by-product remains inside your lungs and slowly and slowly make you unhealthy. Like smoking venting out helps you with releasing steam, so you don’t lose your cool, but its by-product anger makes you negative day by day, and all it left is an empty vessel with more noise and complains.
Even when a group of friends vent about something, it’s more of like passive smoking, and you are not just harming yourself but also others who don’t even smoke or vent.
Recently I saw the movie called Jab We Met a Bollywood film, in which there was a scene in which girl was feeling sad due to her ex left her and broke the promise to marry her. So the boy came up with the plan to help her out by giving her an idea to call him and vent out her anger and abuse him. So she called him, vented her emotions and some bad words, and suddenly she felt good and moved on after she fell in love with that boy. But in real life, if this advice can help then my friend all heartbroken lover can move on quickly just by venting out. Oh, the last I checked haven’t met the person like that.
Many think that venting out is like sharing, but in fact, it’s opposite. Research suggests that letting off steam, even in its purest forms, is not an effective way to control your emotions. These supposedly harmless forms of Venting have shown to increase aggressive behaviour later on. It trains your body to use violence as a way to manage your Borderline personality disorder symptoms. Many people with (BPD) struggle to learn how to vent anger in a way that is healthy and not destructive.
When we’re stressed, it feels good to vent to colleagues or loved ones. Unfortunately, venting about workplace stress, an estranged relationship is not always a healthy method to express your frustration. Sometimes, it can worsen your health. In my own experience, I had not seen someone gets better by venting out they have become worst day by day by following the same pattern. In my personal experience, I have not seen anyone getting better by venting out.
Here some general questions, answer it in yes or no in your mind:
- Did Venting about your day helped you improve your next day?
- Did Venting about your relationship with your friends helped your relationship?
- Did venting about the government, talking about political change government?
- Did Venting about your boss to your colleagues or friends changed your boss behaviour?
- Did Venting about your life, changed your life another day.
If most of the answer is NO, then my friend, you aren’t just helping yourself but also inching closer to unhealthy living or worst forming borderline personality disorder.
Why Venting is terrible and how it’s affecting others:
Many people vomit their feelings but don’t even realize they don’t affect themselves but also their surroundings. It just not affects their mental state but even other’s whenever we vent out. You can’t always complain how bad your day was, how your boss is making your life miserable, how your relationship problem is effecting you or vent your anger upon your loved one. This is all the signs of toxic. It’s always better to confront your problem rather than taking out your steam daily.
Addictive Venting — The more you vent, the more it becomes a habit. When it becomes a habit, you’re acutely attuned to the negative things in life. Since your brain is now more primed to register stressors, it is more challenging to appreciate the more calming or positive facets of work or life.the more a person vented, the worse they felt their days had gone. Complaining also took a toll on people’s mood, and not just during the day when they engaged in it.
Venting effects your image — You feel bonded and connected to people during and after venting, but if you vent too much, you can be perceived as too dramatic or negative. Colleagues and loved ones might begin to avoid you because they now associate you with stress and negativity. This hurts your brand can harm your career.
Effects your loved ones — Many vent not just through words but by physically harming other, emotionally and physically. Ask someone’s wife who’s alcoholic husband comes home drunk and assault her. Ask the child who’s abused, attacked by their parents due to stress accumulated due to their upbringing and horrid life. Ask that person who’s a partner is abusive and addicted to substances.
What to do Instead:
Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction. Break the habit. Talk about your joys.
Channelling the negative emotions out by doing something usefulness, or just working upon yourself is the right way to vent.
Did you know that calm, positive thinking, and kindness are also contagious?
- Take a break: Give yourself some time away from what angers you. Whether it’s an ex-partner or a former friend, stepping outside or leaving a party early to avoid them can help prevent the rage from starting in the first place.
- Make a Journal: Jot down how you’re feeling in a journal or on your blog. By letting out your thoughts and reflecting on your feelings, you can get a better handle on your emotions. Recording things that bother you will help you to release those stressors and move on more quickly. Over time, you will gain insights and perspective as you read your journal entries from a couple of months ago.
- Check your emotions: When we’re stressed, we often let our emotions get the best of us, which can lead to unnecessary conflict and a higher likelihood of Venting.
- Troubleshoot, problem-solve, and experiment on yourself. When you vent about something, you can change, empower yourself by problem-solving and running experiments to improve the situation. Map out your options, decide on one or two scenarios, take small steps, and test them to see what works best. Doing something is better than doing nothing — the transition from feeling powerless to feeling powerful in being able to change the situation.
- Mindfulness: If you are mindfulness to your surroundings, to your inner self, you will be more content with life and will never be needed to vent it out. You vent your negative energy through breathing. The thoughts will come and flow like a cloud. People who can stay in the present moment longer tend to complain less. Focusing on the present involves letting go of your stress about past events or future ones — mindfulness a powerful habit to practice.
- Exercise: Exercising is also of an excellent method to take out some steam of your body. You can start running, join a gym, do yoga or go for a walk, and it will help you take out your negative energy.
In the End
Venting out is addictive; it feels good when you do with your friend and a sense of bonding. It’s like smoking, and we all know smoking is harmful to health, but not everyone can kick out smoking, but we can still help to channelize our negative emotions and venture out to the constructive, open dialogues. Venting out anger and frustration can be done in ways that could be either healthy or unhealthy. All you have to figure out is what are the healthy means of venting out your anger and frustration.
